Ethics in Action

This is the last post until the end of May. If you get hungry for a little mindfulness, check out the archives. Every post from the last year is available anytime. Today’s post is adapted from a previous one.  I wish you a wonderful month.

The thought manifests as the word
The word manifests as the deed
The deed develops into habit
And the habit hardens into character
So watch the thought and its ways with care
And let it spring from love
Born out of concern for all beings

This is one of my favorite pieces of wisdom from the Buddha because I think it’s really true. I know that when my mind thinks caring and kind thoughts, my speech and actions will likely follow suit. I feel clear and at ease. Or if my mind is caught in contention and my thoughts aren’t so kind or caring, I hope I’ll have enough awareness to keep from acting them out and have the restraint to keep my mouth shut.

In the classical Buddhist teachings of the Noble Eightfold Path, Wise or Right Action are those actions that are rooted in harmlessness. The Buddha gives specific guidelines in the form of precepts, a code of ethical conduct. Really, they aren’t so specific to Buddhism; they’re simply the moral, skillful and harmless way of living. You’ll recognize them.

1.      Abstain from taking life; don’t kill

2.      Abstain from taking anything that has not been freely given; don’t steal

3.      Abstain from the misuse of sexuality

4.      Abstain from using harmful or false speech; don’t lie

5.      Abstain from the use of intoxicants to the degree that the mind becomes clouded and causes heedlessness

At first glance, these precepts seem quite obvious, but in actuality they may be more difficult to carry out. 

How far do we take not killing? What about the ants carrying aphids to the artichoke plants or string beans in the garden? What about that magazine on the table in the waiting room at the dentist’s office that has an article you’d like to read? And how do we express our sexuality and in what environments? How about the time we said something in public that was told to us in confidence and caused a friend humiliation? And, the consequences of drinking too much or using other intoxicants are well-known.

Our actions really do have consequences, whether in the immediate or somewhere down the line. This is the law of karma. In fact, karma translates as action. 

I remember a difficult time in my life many years ago when I was struggling with an unhealthy relationship, doing everything I could to make it work. It took me quite a while to see that nearly every encounter I had brought me pain, seemingly endless pain. It was like sitting in a chair with a broken leg. Each time I sat in that chair, I fell on the ground and injured my tailbone.

The Buddha taught that our happiness and unhappiness are dependent upon our own actions, not on anyone else’s wishes for us. This is what it means to be the heir to our own karma. The truth that we really can and do directly influence our lives through our own actions is a profoundly liberating statement. When our motivations and intentions come from harmlessness and goodwill, we are likely to act skillfully and wisely.

I find that when I really pay attention, I am my own best guide.

“When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. That is my religion.” 

                                                                      Abraham Lincoln

Internal Disarmament

Spring is in full bloom in northern California. The rhododendrons, azaleas, viburnum and flowering cherry trees are bursting with flowers. It’s gorgeous.

I spent the morning rowing on Humboldt Bay with two dear friends in perfect conditions; flat water, no wind, sun shining and so much birdlife. Even the seals were curiously poking their heads up alongside our boats to check us out. Mornings like this are full of connection and belonging. They’re the threads that weave and bind us to ourselves, to our families and friends, and to our communities and the natural world. It’s the stuff of spiritual practice.

In our meditation groups, we show up week after week to sit together, to practice together. None of us could do this without the other. Our practice depends on it. We could actually say that our lives depend on it, because they do. I depend on my weekly groups as one of the core supports for my life. 

Whatever our practice is, whether it’s in a formal setting, out in nature, reading a book, listening to music, talking with a friend, making a meal, it feeds our spirits and we can’t do it alone. We might we think we can, but for practice to really flourish, we need each other.

Each week in class our meditations include both mindfulness/insight practice as well as metta, the practice of intentionally inclining the mind and heart towards goodwill and kindness. But they’re really not separate practices.  Mindfulness is inherently kind, and being kind is by nature mindful. 

I don’t think we can be kind without being mindful. It just doesn't work because the intention is ultimately the same; to settle the mind, open the heart, and cultivate a soft resilience that allows us to be engaged in our lives skillfully and wisely without rancor or contention. In fact, the Dalai Lama talks about these practices as “the process of internal disarmament.”

Mindfulness and kindness are intimately and inextricably linked, and the outcome is a clear mind and a loving heart. When we intentionally infuse our lives with kindness and awareness, our connections deepen and our sense of belonging grows.

A Rabbit Noticed My Condition

I was sad one day and went for a walk;

I sat in a field.

A rabbit noticed my condition and

Came near.

It often does not take more than that to help at times-

To just be close to creatures who

Are so full of knowing,

So full of love

That they don’t

-chat,

They just gaze with their

Marvelous understanding.

-St. John of the Cross

My Daughter Fell Off the Trampoline

My daughter Sarah had a beautiful butterfly stroke. She was eight years old and swam with fluidity, strength and desire. I loved sitting in the bleachers watching her swim, marveling at her ease and determination. Sometime that year, her father set up a trampoline in our back yard. The kids were overjoyed and I could feel disaster looming.

One day after school the kids were having a great time on tramp. I was in the kitchen making dinner when I heard Sarah scream. I looked out the window and saw her crumpled on the ground holding her arm and her brother running in to get me. She had fallen off of the trampoline not while jumping, but while trying to sit down on the edge and missing the rim with her outstretched arm, falling to the ground arm straight palm first. She’d fractured her elbow.

What does this have to do with mindfulness or meditation? Lately I’ve been thinking about what brought me to practice, why I practice and what sustains me. Sarah’s elbow fracture was really bad. It took lots and lots of physical therapy and many months to heal. It was the end of that beautiful butterfly stroke. 

One day Sarah and I were talking about what sort of activity she thought would be fun and she suggested yoga. Not long after that, she and I took an Introduction to Yoga class series where my meditation practice crept back into my life and really took hold.

So when I think about what brought me to practice, it was my husband buying the trampoline and my daughter falling off of it. I can’t say that I’m grateful for the trampoline accident. We got rid of it not long after, but I am grateful to my daughter for choosing yoga and allowing me to go to class with her. 

I was lucky enough to have a yoga teacher who integrated meditation quite naturally into her teaching, and the same teacher for introducing me to a book written by Sylvia Boorstein, who is now one of my primary teachers and mentors.

Why I practice and what sustains me are two sides of the same coin and are mutually supportive. Mindfulness practice both in formal meditation and daily life help me live a kinder, more compassionate and wise life through cultivating clarity and patience. 

I don’t always get it right, but practice supports and sustains these intentions, and keeps me on track. And when I do get it right, I know why I practice. It really works.

What brought you to practice?

Why do you practice?

What sustains you?

Why do you read this blog?

“We know what is proper, especially in difficult situations, from the wisdom arising out of contemplation.”

           Confucius